Help For Pornography & Sexual Addiction

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In ancient Asia men learned to tame wild elephants. These powerful beasts were directed for the constructive use of man by gaining trust in their rider. These powerful beasts would respond to the gentle direction given. This is a good analogy as to how the two-part brain works.

The elephant can be likened unto the limbic system which is strong and powerful while the pre-frontal cortex can be likened unto the rider. Which one do you think is stronger, the elephant or the rider?

It is obvious as to pure strength that the elephant is stronger but when the elephant can learn to trust the rider then great things can be accomplished. It must be understood that the elephant will not trust the rider if it is beaten into submission. It is through patience, love and constant redirection that this relationship is developed. Understand that you have a part of yourself that is like the elephant but you also have a part of yourself that is like the rider. The rider can learn to direct the elephant and thereby making a powerful and positive force for good.

Do dailies and constantly holding yourself accountable for your actions is how to do this. As you do this you are in the process of getting better every day. Don’t give up is setbacks come. Learn from them, pick yourself up and move on. The rider who has tamed the elephant has spent years of constant work and patience.

Keep moving forward!

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“We would like to celebrate heroism and heroes as special acts by special people.  However, most people who are held up to this higher plane insist that what they did was not special, was really what everyone should have done in the situation.  They refuse to consider themselves “hero’s.”  Maybe such a reaction comes from the ingrained notion we all have – that hero’s are supermen and women, a cut or more above the common breed.  Perhaps more than their modesty is at work.  Perhaps, rather, it is our general misconception of what it takes to be heroic.” – Philip Zimbardo

Perhaps the greatest acts of heroism go unnoticed on a daily basis as one continues to maintain their sobriety in an increasingly challenging world.  Heroism focuses us on what is right with human nature.  We care about heroic stories because they serve as powerful reminders that people are capable of resisting evil, of not giving in to temptations, of rising above mediocrity, and of heeding the call to action and to service when others fail to act.  Be a hero today by focusing on your future picture statement and doing your dailies!  The power to influence the world resides in small acts.

Remember the statement by Margaret Mead a cultural anthropologist who said, “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.”

Be a HERO today!

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“People may wonder why anybody would want to run a distance race. What fun is it? Why all the hard, exhausting work? Where does it get you? It is one of the strange ironies of this strange life that those who work the hardest, who subject themselves to the strictest discipline, who give up certain pleasurable things in order to achieve a goal, are the happiest men.”
-Brutus Hamilton

Remember in your daily journey that there is a huge difference between instant gratification and lasting peace. Someone once said that the hallmark of emotional intelligence is the ability to delay instant gratification. Accept what you cannot control and discipline yourself to manage what you can. Triggers mean nothing – it is what you choose to do with them that matters. Lean into the wind and move forward.

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Why so much focus on the youth?

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A question we frequently get is, “My pastor says stop looking at porn. I want to. I try to but have not been able to. What do I do?”

A few things you need to understand:

• This is an addiction
• Addiction is a powerful brain disease
• Chemical reactions are taking place
• The brain actually changes.
• To overcome sexual addiction issues like pornography there needs to be additional help. There are very few people that will power alone will help you manage this addictive behavior.

You need to learn the Language of Recovery

• Acceptance and Surrender
• Awareness
• Mindfulness
• Faith

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Are you addicted to pornography?

Can you relate to any of the following; Secrecy, living a double life, denial, or justification?

Have you ever said to yourself, “It’s better to just keep my porn viewing to myself rather hurt those I love from the pain the truth will cause?”

What about saying, “I will never view pornography again; this is the last time I will ever view porn?”

How about hating porn so much that you would give anything to have it out of your life, but almost mockingly the craving hits so hard you forget the pain it causes and give in despite knowing better?

The double life makes you feel like you are two different people. Sometimes you wonder how the monster inside and burning cravings can come so alive at the forefront when most of the time you live life as a normal decent person. Are you to the point or been at the point where you figure it is just easier to give in because whatever you try or commit to doesn’t work?

Does seeking out and viewing porn seem like a “hunt” or give you a “rush” in the quest to find your next porn fix?

Have you ever been caught viewing pornography and immediately began denying to save face, get angry and justify, or feel so small you want to shrink and disappear knowing you are had?

Are you to the point where viewing porn doesn’t even feel wrong like it used to but the negative consequences are astoundingly real?

Have you ever gone to someone seeking help but not experiencing long-term results in getting away from porn?

Do you have a spouse or close family that has been affected by your habits or do you keep your porn viewing a secret?

Has porn destroyed your relationship(s)? Do your intimate and/or sexual thoughts revolve around porn?

If you have said yes to any of these questions, you are a porn addict. The fact is that is that pornography addicts have confronted most if not all of these questions.

If you don’t agree, then stop; never view porn again. If you deny you are an addict and then view porn again, know that there is somewhere that can bring hope and help in this widespread addiction. It is ok to admit that you need help; denying that fact will only bring you and those you love more pain.

It is important is to understand that you are not alone. There are millions of porn addicts in the world today, with over 40 million in the US alone. Thousands want help but are so confused they either give up trying or feel like they are running around in circles never able to get a handle on stopping. Another fact is that hundreds of porn addicts have found sobriety though Innergold.

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We took the time to interview Robert and to find out why he chose to join the InnerGold team and head up the Youth Addiction programs for InnerGold.

Learn more about Robert: http://helplds.com

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I was reading and responding to a popular forum for pornography addicts last night. I ran into a couple interesting posts. One man who had been trying to get rid of his pornography addiction for quite some time was to the point of complete despair and was suicidal. Another young man had just decided it was time to fess up and stop his porn addiction and was hopeful in beginning his journey.

The young man said that he knew he could do by himself it through willpower and spiritual help alone. The suicidal man, once hopeful, said that he had been already trying for a long time, given up hope, and was so discouraged that there wasn’t’ any point any more. Why do I relate this story?

In recovering from porn addiction one must realize that they cannot do this on their own. Willpower alone is not sufficient. Willpower alone is an defense the brain creates to always have “an excuse” to look at porn and act out again in the future. Trying to do this by control and willpower alone is what leads a man to want to give up due to so many failures at the willpower thing.

It is only when we admit that we need help and cannot do this by willpower alone that we can begin true addiction recovery. This attitude is the beginning of surrender. One must literally give up “fighting” and realize that the addiction is more powerful than themselves. One must respect the power of pornography addiction and learn to accept that they will have addictive desires for the rest of their lives. The desires are normal and not the problem. What human being doesn’t have daily desires? The key is learning to live a happy and productive life without fighting the addiction but rather learning to respect and live with the addiction. This is the attitude of addiction recovery that enables the porn addict to gain the power to lean into the pain of desire without acting out on those feelings. As such sobriety is possible!

If you are struggling with an addiction and need addiction counseling, we can help. You can call us at 801-636-2080

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We apologize but the audio file has become corrupt. We are trying to quickly fix it. – InnerGold

We took the time to interview Robert and to find out why he chose to join the InnerGold team and head up the Youth programs for InnerGold.

Learn more about Robert: http://helplds.com

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